Keeping the Heart Open in Times of Crisis

I write this at a time when, like many, my heart is heavy with sadness and concern. Although there are other tragic conditions happening on our planet, the current crisis in the Mideast is affecting me in both a disorienting and tender way. Seeing the atrocities committed by terrorists, I wonder how it is that humans can be so lacking in humanity. And there is great sadness over the response of overwhelming force and destruction with so many innocent people caught in the middle. I do my best to hold it all skillfully.

I’m in touch with good friends in Israel who have shared with me their fear, feelings of unsafety, concern over Israeli hostages and confusion as to the most appropriate response. Is it to go in with full force, make sure that Hamas is defeated and, in the process, kill many innocent women and children? This goes against everything in their Buddhist practice. And yet, would there not be justification?

I think of all the Palestinians who have nothing to do with Hamas, who simply want to live their life but instead are living in terror in the most unimaginably traumatizing conditions with death and destruction all around, cut off from food, water, and medical care—innocent pawns in this game of revenge and hatred.

I’ve been asked what is the correct Buddhist response? I wish I could provide an easy answer. The one thing I do know is that having my heart filled with hatred is not going to bring more peace. As the Buddha famously said: “Hatred never ceases by hatred. Hatred ceases by love alone. This is an ancient and eternal law.”

 Even more eloquently are Martin Luther King Jr.’s words:

"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: Only love can do that." 

I believe that underneath the hatred and impulse to hurt is one’s own trauma, pain and hurt. As probably many of you know, I was raised Jewish. It just so happened when I was bar mitzvahed at age 13, my reading portion of the Torah that week happened to be the famous passage, “an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.“ This passage always troubled me, and perhaps it’s one reason that I turned to Buddhism for another way.

One of the most moving responses in this terrible conflict is a 9-minute video of a 19-year old Israeli girl who survived the Hamas bombing on October 7 when the kibbutz she lives on was attacked. She lost many friends and was herself severely traumatized as she spoke into the camera fiercely admonishing all who could listen. Her message through all of her grief and anger was, “Do not talk to me about revenge. I lose some of my strength every time I hear the word revenge…Look inside, very well, deep inside. Ask yourself what your values are.”

Last week Stephen Fulder, senior Israeli Dharma teacher who started Tovana, the Israeli Insight Meditation organization many years ago, visited my Berkeley community online. He is a wise, heartful, and deeply respected teacher. Here is the video of his talk. He spoke of the ways that he and other practitioners have been trying to bridge the divide between Israelis and Palestinians. He heartfully elaborated on words he had written in his Statement on the Current Tragic Situation:

“Over many years, I and colleagues have been bringing groups of Israelis to the West Bank to spend a weekend on peace-making workshops with Palestinians, at times when the dominant voices said that peace was impossible and only violence and suppression worked. We found that our tools of deep listening, sharing our pain and daily life experiences, and being in each other’s shoes, created a lasting bond and showed all of us that peace was possible. The truth of our shared vulnerability creates an opportunity for transformation.”

The challenge is how can we keep our heart open in times of crisis like this? How can we stay connected to our innate compassion? How can we hold our breaking hearts with equanimity? How can we allow ourselves to feel the love that’s inside in spite of it all?

I encourage all who are committed to personal awakening and to bringing more consciousness into the world to keep developing the heart qualities of Loving-Kindness, Compassion, Joy, and Equanimity. Along with clarity and wisdom, those are the qualities that enable us to hold all the pain and suffering that the Buddha so accurately taught is an intrinsic part of being human and inherent in life.